Dating Advice For Women: The Biology Of Infidelity
“Isn’t it ever enough?”
Buy “Sperm Wars” now!
A female friend asked me this, recently, concerning the Anthony Weiner scandal — a respected, young Congressman with a beautiful wife, sending sexy photos of himself to other women. Isn’t it enough that he already has a beautiful wife?
No
The short answer, ladies, is no. (The long answer is yes. More on that later.) Instinctively, men want to have sex with as many beautiful women as possible. I think most of you know this, but are unwilling to accept it.
Furthermore, men aren’t the only ones for whom it isn’t enough. Come on, admit it, ladies! During your club-going days, you routinely flirted, danced and sometimes even made out with several guys in the same night. Some of you went home with one guy on a Friday night, and another guy on a Saturday night. Some of you went home with a guy one night, and then went home to your boyfriends or husbands in the same night.
Okay, maybe you weren’t a party girl. Even still, some of you “good girls” — in happy, committed relationships — have gotten carried away in the moment with a hot guy. You thought you’d never be unfaithful. You were judgmental of those who were–until it happened to you.
Some of you willfully cast discretion aside for a fling, out of revenge or just plain boredom. I have a female friend whom I’ve known for many years. She is a major beauty pageant winner, a respected member of her community, a church-going wife and mother of three. And yet, when she ran into her first boyfriend a few years ago (not me, by the way), she couldn’t resist the temptation to have sex with him, for old time’s sake.
Guess what she did afterward? She went home and had the most passionate sex with her husband that she’d had in years! I asked her if she felt guilty about the fling. She said, “Oddly, no.”
Farmers Mark It
I happened to be reading a book, at the time, called “Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict and Other Bedroom Matters“, in which evolutionary biologist Robin Baker posits that women are biologically programmed to set up competitions between men. These often take the form of jealous rivalries amongst suitors. But they also take place in the uterus. And what queen doesn’t relish a good joust, both in and out of the womb?