Hit Piece #4Dating Coach Bashed By Disgruntled Pet Sitter
crazygirldotcom
The first sitter I found — let’s call her Obnoxia von Disturbenfrau — played hide-and-seek with me for a few days: first agreeing to do the job; then rescheduling our appointment to meet the cats; then backing out altogether the day before my trip.
Over the phone, she said, “Uh . . . I’ve decided I’m not gonna do it. I just don’t feel right about it. I don’t think we’re a good match.”
“Based on what?” I replied.
She repeated, “I just don’t think we’re a good match.”
I had to remind myself that I was talking to a business acquaintance, and not someone I had met on CrazyGirlDotCom.
My gut told me that she was afraid to come over and be alone with me (a man) in my apartment to meet the cats. While I sympathize with this notion, I live in a gay neighborhood, for Christ’s sake — which, these days in America, means clean and pretty and, mostly, safe.
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Everything I have written about political hit pieces builds to this singular ignominious moment . . .
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Not to mention, hadn’t she ever heard of pepper spray? Or if she’s THAT worried, she could get a gun; Illinois is a Concealed Carry state.
Regardless, my trip was set, and I was suddenly without a pet sitter. When I mentioned this to her, she hit me with a sing-songy, “Sor-ry!”, before hanging up.
Time To Fume
I was furious! But I had no time to fume.
The next pet sitter I got ahold of answered the phone, came over that day to meet the cats, and took excellent care of them. In other words, she was a normal professional. I highly recommend her — Tina at Andersonville Pet Sitting. Please notice that all seven of Tina’s Yelp reviews are five-star (out of five stars). [Please note that Tina has since shut down this business for reasons unknown. Probably moved away, or found something else to do.]
After my trip to WI, I made time to fume about Obnoxia. I was curious to know if she routinely created drama with her customers, or if she had reserved that behavior for me.
Turns out, it wasn’t just me. There were several negative reviews on Obnoxia’s Yelp listing. And in each case, she had used the REPLY box to write lengthy justifications of her behavior; placing ALL blame on the disgruntled customers.
And so I felt justified in venting my frustration over her rudeness to me, with a brief review (154 words) that ended thus:
I can see from this review forum that a few other people have had unpleasant encounters with [Obnoxia]. And she denies everything. So I have no doubt she will do the same here.
Which is exactly what she did, nine months later.
The Little Turd That Could
I wrote my review in August of 2015. In May of 2016, I got an email notice saying that someone had left a review of my listing on Google My Business.
What listing? What business? Exactly my thoughts.
And it wasn’t just any ole review; but a one-star review. And it wasn’t just any ole listing; but a listing I had placed five years earlier, gotten zero traffic from, and forgotten about.
I was a dating coach, in those days. Okay? Among other things. The name of the business and its website was Maestro’s Method.
Former Dating Coach Greg Silva. Chicago, 2008.
Most people laugh when they hear that I was a dating coach. Looking at my fiftysomething broke ass. But it used to be big business. Not my ass, mind you. Teaching people how to flirt. Used to be big business.
Nevertheless, that business got swept away with the crash in 08. I have learned through much hardship and turmoil that financial gods must always be placated ahead of dating gods. The dating gods can die, for all the financial gods care.
When I finally went broke in 2010, I swam in many directions looking for land. Thus I persisted with the dating coaching affair for a short while. But I quickly swam in another direction; and another, and another. Until I finally found a stable income.
So who could this be? And what could this be about?
Turns out, it was my old friend Obnoxia, dropping a turd that had gestated for nine months. She gave birth to a hit piece!
Everything I have written about political hit pieces builds to this singular ignominious moment:
Beware: Greg, the “Maestro,” has disgusting, oppressive views toward women. He openly, unabashedly, refers to women as “bimbos” and “bitches” and thinks he is a gift to them and that they owe him their affection. On his personal blog, he has written a post about how he seeks “revenge” on all the women who have turned him down; that he would “show them who’s boss” and that “they would be sorry one day when [he] became everything they always wanted.” It is beyond disturbing. These are not attitudes that anyone, let alone a “dating coach,” should have.
And that was the massive 1-star bowel movement that Obnoxia deposited on my Google My Business listing for Maestro’s Method.
After reading this, I got up and washed the dishes to clear my mind. And then I sat down and wrote the following in the REPLY box:
Reader Beware: The above review was written by a pet sitter [Obnoxia] I had a horrible experience with. I wrote a scathing review of the experience, and now she is attempting to exact her revenge by willfully misreading and misquoting something from my blog. The blog as a whole is comprised of mild humor and inspiration on sex, religion, and politics. While I do challenge social norms, the overall tone is intended to be compassionate and uplifting. The article to which [Obnoxia] refers is self-satirical — making fun of myself for my youthful awkwardness with women. To purposely characterize this piece as being pejorative towards all women, rather than to some women, as well as to me, is a big stretch. Here is a link to the piece, called Rigorous Honesty. You are welcome to join the conversation. I simply ask that you keep it positive.
Keep in mind, again, that her attack on me occurred nine months after I wrote my review on her Yelp listing. In other words, she stewed for nine months; or else she didn’t see my review for nine months.
We’re approaching the 10th anniversary of SRP (2020). Our website hosts enough infotainment to last our visitors a long time. Plus, we update it several times a week [as of February 2019].
Therefore, it must have taken Obnoxia a significant chunk of her life to hunt down damaging information about me online. In fairness to Obnoxia . . . I’m sure it took me a lot longer to write this series about hit pieces than it took for Obnoxia to find and create her smack about me. The difference — and it’s a big one — is that I don’t expect Obnoxia ever to read this. That’s why I changed her name. I’m not trying to hurt her personally.
SRP presents everyday power struggles in thoughtful and amusing ways. Online trolling is now more common in America than mass shootings. And that’s saying a lot, people!
That’s essentially what Obnoxia did to me, folks. She trolled me. By finding an article I wrote five years ago. Then by finding some kind of business listing on which she could write a review. Gimme a taste o’ me own medicine, she did.
The SRP website is not listed on Yelp or Google My Business. But Maestro’s Method is [Actually, I took it down, as explained here.].
If you’re keeping score, Crazy Petsitter:
→ Took information from the distant past of the SRP website
→ Re-characterized that info to sound as damning as possible
→ Used that distortion as a review of my old dating coaching service (without ever having tried the service, I must say)
Goodbye Yellow Stream Media
In preparing this series of articles — for which this is the fourth and final installment — I went back to Ms. Disturbenfrau’s Yelp listing to double-check my memory. She currently has 16 reviews. Five of them are one-star (out of five stars). Two of them are two-star. And three of these one and two-star reviews were left in the months following mine. That’s seven out of 16 blatantly negative reviews, all followed by her lengthy rebuttals.
What’s to be made of the hoopla I’ve created over this nasty exchange between me and Obnoxia? Well, for one, these articles about political hit pieces great and small will last a lot longer than that encounter. So, I have my disgruntled pet sitter to thank for that. Harrumph!
But finally — and for one last time — we live in a world where anyone can say anything about anybody to almost everybody. And millions of people will believe that thing without question.
You know what this means, don’t ya? It’s up to the rest of us to keep out of the troll traps. Or once ensnared, at least to warn others.
These are smart essays, Gregory. Well done!
Aw shucks, sir. Thanks.