Handsome Man Joke

Still Single After All These Years

The reason I’m still single, is because women, typically, have to be either the pretty one or the smart one; and, in my case, most of the time, they’re neither.

I shouldn’t have to explain this, but people these days like to get offended. This is a joke. Self-aggrandizing, yes; but a joke, nevertheless, in the style of Oscar Wilde. If you don’t see this as a joke, or if you don’t know who Oscar Wilde is, then you deserve to read this condescending addendum. Either way, this isn’t just about me. Though there’s nothing wrong with it being just about me. In fact, I think it should be all about me. Me, me, me. Why not? Walt Whitman wrote a piece (and a long one, too) called “Song Of Myself.” But what’s with me referencing all these homosexuals? Huh? What’s that all about? That’s what I’m really trying to say here. But . . . where was I? Oh . . . I dedicate this to all the other smart, handsome fellers out there who aren’t me, but who are . . . still single.