City Life, Part Twenty-Three: Sidewalk Chicken
Hey people . . . can we all just agree to walk on the right, instead of meandering like zombies and playing sidewalk chicken?
Greg Silva
Valet Log: 060611 — 97 Year-Old Black Woman
Imagine Captain Kirk as a parking valet . . . looking into the eyes of a 97 year-old black woman and seeing American history.
Valet Log: 060511 — Kid Worth
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . wrangling 2 year-olds. How much is a kid worth these days?
Valet Log: 060411 — Hypocrisy Police
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . uttering mindless pleasantries, haunted by the hypocrisy police.
Valet Log: 060111 — Street Parking Battles
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . battling other taxpayers for street parking privileges.
My Legacy: Goodness and Mercy
Say hello to my little friends, Goodness and Mercy. They follow me around like a puppy dog. Actually, I owe it all to them.
White Guilt: My Rosa Parks Reflex
What would I do if Rosa Parks got on my bus? A moment of levity in the long, sad history of American race relations.
City Life, Part Twenty-Two: The Windbag City
On every bus, train, and street corner in Chicago, a LOUDMOUTH holds court, bloviating banalities willy-nilly, like a royal leaf blower.
Women Who Work Hard To Avoid Looking At Men
I have known women who will avoid looking at a guy because he’s too handsome; then avoid looking at another guy because he’s too ugly.
Valet Log: 051911d — The Girl With a Secret Message From Oprah
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . meeting crazy people on the street who wanna talk to Oprah. Hey, whatever Oprah wants.
Valet Log: 051911b — Working Guy
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . commiserating with a hot street walker on a hot night.
Valet Log: 051911a — Paternity Test Joke
Imagine Captain Kirk as a middle-age parking valet . . . surprising a female customer with a quip about a paternity test.